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They had tried therapy, self-help books, seminars. But nothing seemed to make a difference. It seemed as if they were stuck in a vicious cycle. They knew they needed to change things in their relationship...but they just didn't know how. I'm not going to try and convince you that I was able to undo years of fighting, struggling and disappointment in a day. But, with what they learned in my office that day, they decided to put their impending divorce "on hold." Within a few weeks, there was a dramatic transformation in their marriage... There were no angry arguments that went nowhere. There was no "living like roommates" or sleeping on the couch. There was no more name-calling or tearing-down of each other. Their, previously sexless, marriage saw sparks of true pleasure and intimacy again. Last week, Kelly called to invite me to their anniversary and "re-commitment" ceremony! Most marriage therapists are not trained to be marriage counselors. They receive their training in traditional, individual therapy, and add marital counseling to their practice... after the fact. In other words, most marriage therapists have little expertise in helping a troubled marriage. And, when they do offer marital counseling, they are, usually, applying outdated, ineffective strategies that were never intended to help truly troubled marriages. This is why the best marriage counselors see a success rate of only 20%. . . if a medical procedure was that risky. . . it would be outlawed! I know from experience, because I too was frustrated with such a low rate of success. I sincerely desired to help my clients to save their marriages. But, the techniques and strategies I learned in school seemed to be making things worse! Once I realized that "traditional" methods of marriage therapy don't work, I determined to find and create strategies, techniques and methods that do work. It led me to abandon much of the "old school" ideas about how to help troubled couples...and so should you! Please watch this video on why "Marital Therapy" can be destructive to your situation!

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